Archive for December, 2009
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It’s New Year’s Eve and you know what means? Somewhere, a ball is going to drop!
You know, taken out of context that sounded really bad….
What I really want to talk about is resolutions, people. New Year’s resolutions, to be exact. Because there’s nothing we love more than to make a bunch of resolutions and then fail to follow through on them. Well, you know what? My New Year’s Resolution is to follow through on all of my New Year’s Resolutions.
1. Moving. My wife and I are going to redouble our efforts to get out of here. Where we’re going to end up, we haven’t quite decided. We’re torn between the lovely North Carolina and the Broward County area of Florida, where family is. But whatever happens, Naples, FL has worn out it’s welcome and we’re eager to get it behind us.
2. Exercise more. I know, it seems cliché. I mean, it’s what everyone resolves to do every new year. But my wife and I have a head start on this one, having started back in November. So, really, all we have to do is maintain our routine. And if nothing else, I am a man of routine.
3. Finish the 3rd Alex Cheradon novel. Between trying to stay ahead on Rupert & Me and the holidays, I’ve fallen a little behind on a new book. With the recent surge in sales for Fruitbasket from Hell and A is for Amnesia, B is for Bullet(I do mean surge), I am redoubling my efforts to get this book done!
I think that’s it. I don’t want to put too much up here. If you make too many resolutions it’s too easy to get overwhelmed and not do any of them. So I’m going to stick with these three.
What about, dear readers, have you any New Year’s Resolutions you care to share? Go ahead and drop ‘em in the comments.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, my wife and I are spending New Year’s Eve at her old stomping grounds. She has assured me there’s plenty to do, so I can’t sit in front of the computer this time around. So I’m off for a night of dancing and romancing. See everyone next year.
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This comic was inspired by a comment someone made on Facebook. You know who you are, Kevin.
Everyone have a good holiday? Get lots of great gifts? Eat lots of fruitcake? I know I did. Have a good holiday, that is. I didn’t eat any fruitcake. Does anyone actually eat that anymore? And who’s brilliant idea was it to combine fruit and cake? Seriously, I don’t want any healthy foods mixing in with my junk foods.
My wife and I spent a delightful Christmas with her equally delightful family. And, in all honesty, I no longer think of them as her family, but our family and, really, that was the best Christmas gift this year.
So, anyway, Christmas is over, the year is almost over, no scratch that. The decade is almost over! Our computers are going to crash and we’re going to get plunged into the Dark Ages!! Everyone, pull your money from the banks! Stock up on water and canned goods! And–wait, wrong decade.
Er. Pardon me. I seem to have gotten my notes mixed up here.
(Flipping through notes frantically)
Ah, here we are.
*ahem*
While some people have been looking into the past the decade for their Best of Decade lists and what-not, I’ve decided to look forward. Join me, as we gaze into the future and examine what Weddings will be like this new decade.
(Insert random sound effect here)
Let’s face it, weddings can be expensive and overblown events. Lots of people to invite, lots of people not to invite, lots of people to offend, etc, so on and so forth. But don’t worry, in the new decade weddings are actually going to be easier!
I know what you’re thinking: I’m crazy. How can weddings possibly be easier?
We’re in a digital age, baby. Everything else has gone digital. It’s time for weddings to as well.
Think about it: you and your soon-to-be-better-half both have Facebook accounts. Have the wedding over Facebook! Does it get any easier than that? You don’t need to physically invite anyone, all of your friends can attend! Instead of exchanging vows, change your relationship status. You don’t have to worry about a ceremony, reception, food, nothing! What about gifts you ask? Register at Amazon, they can ship your wedding gifts right to your doorstep.
Now, I know that there may be a few of you who might not be down with a Facebook wedding. You’ll say that it’s too impersonal, too distant. Well, don’t worry. I’ve got something you as well.
Xbox Live. That’s right. You heard me. Xbox Live. Its Live, folks. Real time. Plus, with everyone can talk to each other. You and your beloved can exchange vows in between zombie kills. Invite your friends and family along for Gears of Zombie War 3000. Whoever gets to Level 9 is included in the virtual wedding. Whoever doesn’t, well, so sad, too bad. It’s the ultimate interactive wedding. Of course, there’s the possibility that you or beloved might be killed before you getting to your own ceremony, but, hey, that’s what cheat codes are for!
Last, but certainly not least, Twitter. Create a special twitter account for your wedding, something like @Krumbinesspecialday and invite your twitter followers(friends) to follow! It occurs in the real time, but without the pesky voices and chatterboxes that come along with Xbox Live.
As I’m sure you’ve already noticed, all these new decade wedding options have at least one thing in common: You don’t have to leave your home to get married. From I Do to Honeymoon in minutes. And let’s face it, isn’t it the Honeymoon where we’d all rather be anyway?
